Turbaconducken takes flight

turbaconduckenSorry, no skiing to report. With less than sub-par conditions in the mountains, I’ve been researching the next “freak-mobile”. this annoying project should be completed just in time for the wonderful low pressure headed our way.

PowderPrincess also found something other than skiing to do, and has invited some freaks over for a pre-solstice feast. Here’s the report, in her words:

Turbaconducken in all it's glory

By the PowderPrincess

having a soft spot for things excessive, kitschy and just this side of tasteless, and also yearning to be the star once more of my childhood tv show, Experiments In The Kitchen, i knew that i had to make this dish after seeing it on www.bacontimes.com. this one is right up there with james bond girls and plastic pink flamingos.

turducken- a turkey stuffed with a duck stuffed with a chicken. if you were to google this and watch a few videos on youtube, as i did, first your jaw would drop in a what the he..???? type expression. then you would be laughing and good, belly jiggling gafaw. as i read in one blog, it’s not a turd, it’s a triple bird. this dish has a serious and dedicated following. but my accomplice, mattson, and i were going to take turducken one step farther.

turbaconducken- a chicken wrapped in bacon, stuffed in a duck wrapped in bacon, stuffed in a turkey, which is lavishly wrapped in, you guessed it – bacon.

as mattson remarked, “it’s weird, but that’s my kind of weird baby!”

we procured our birds, our bacon, and a new meat thermometer (i just broke my grandmother’s hand me down thermometer- oops mercury spill). it wasn’t until i mentioned my project to my mom who after bemoaning, “why do you want to do this?” remarked that she used to really hate de-boning chicken, that i had the fleeting thought that i might be over my head. a small panic raced through me. de-boning? but i am a virgin de-boner! i emailed mattson in a very concerned state. could we de-bone not just one bird, but three? it turned out that he too was a virgin de-boner, but at least we were in this together and we have sharp knives.

after hours of de-boning videos on the net (of which yan’s chicken de-boning in 19 seconds and pre- de-boning massage was the either the funniest or the most disturbing) we were ready. we started with the chicken just in case things went awry, nobody would see it anyway. though slightly munched, de-doning the chicken went off with out a hitch. next came the duck, so far so good. the turkey was only partially de-boned so that it lookes like just a plain old turkey from the outside (surprise!). mattson seemed to be in almost a zen state, remarking, “somehow, i just knew what to do.”

a little apple and pine nut stuffing in the chicken and then it was all bacon all the time. 6lbs of it. the pig/bird went into the oven and is in for a nice long suana.

now i have not just one pot of stock but three! my next project is to render the duck fat and to try and recreate leni’s potatoes in duck fat.

and just in case you were wondering, i am still a vegitarian.

4 thoughts on “Turbaconducken takes flight

  1. Foothill Post author

    It was actually quite good. My stomach is back to normal now too so there’s really nothing bad to say about it… Wait a minute, I think i’m having a heart attack…..

  2. raf huckersley

    dang,

    that makes me want to hurl. As a vegetarian I am especially appalled. I think I will tell PETA. Hey, where is your great skiing? Us east coasters look forward to your pics and useless but fun words.

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